The leper, deep in sorrow.
At moon rise, in the barley field,
He devours a child.
—Jeong-Ju Seo, trans. Heejung Sim
I am the slow-steady flow
Of water draining
Around you. Pooling
Around ankles
Listless
When stopped.
My fishbowl lenses
Curve the world,
Suspend my eyes in
Clear light so
You can’t see me.
I pour my tea
Amber down my throat
As though the solute-world
Would crystallize.
I have a terrifying character
It slips from my ears
Or drips from my lips.
I will not repent.
I spin in off-kilter worlds.
Retrograde rotation
Of me around the sun.
Pinpricks in shoulders,
Dull unease.
I drown in air.
In mobius-strip dreams
I punch patterns in
Bound brown rice paper
Stretched in looping reams.
I know green emotion
Moss haze in swimming pool,
Tendril swamp.
I know the death drive
And the leper too:
I have silos inside
I store sorghum dusk-crimson,
I need to survive. Even if
I need to eat the child,
I will not repent.
I can’t tell you what it should be
But I think I have an idea
Of the things my eyes see
Upon hearing your words of poetry.
It’s a dense forest.
You’ve lost your way
But the strong smell of pine trees
Gives you an escape
Back to familiarity.
The rough, grainy feel
Of dusty red bricks.
From the clay on this earth
That forms both past
And future abodes.
The deep blue of the blackberries
That you eat in summer
Like the midnight sky
Staining purple On your rose tinted lips.
It’s the campfires you built.
The logs and birch bark turning black
As fire consumes them
And the flames jump skyward
To disappear into smoke.
Like a memory in our minds —
Of your poetry.
Six months after you sent that “Hey”
Suddenly your feelings float away,
Am I not enough,
to make you stay?
I’m sorry
that I talk a lot,
I’m sorry for
the trouble I brought,
I’m sorry
For the pain that I wrought.
Is that why,
you left in such a huff?
And put me out
with such a snuff?
I’m sorry
that it’s you not me,
I know
this wasn’t meant to be.
I’m sorry
That you wasted time,
And I’m sorry
you’re no longer mine.